WORDS TO SAY IN YOUR FIRST DATE.

The data showed that women felt more connected when men were actively

engaged in the conversation and focused on them. Women were more likely to feel connected when men:

• “mimicked their laughter” (meaning they laughed right after the woman laughed, not made fun of their laugh).
• “interrupted them” (also not what it sounds like – asked questions to show they were paying attention).
• demonstrated their appreciation by saying positive or flattering things.
• used the word “you.”

Men reported feeling less connected when women did what the researchers called "hedging" -- saying things like "kind of," "sort of" and "maybe."

In contrast, the men said they felt a spark when women talked about themselves, using words like “I,” “me,” “myself.” (In fact, the researchers suggest that it may be a bad sign for a man's date if the woman is asking a lot of questions about the man. “We found that questions were used by women to keep a lagging conversation going,” they wrote.)

The researchers looked not just at what people said but also how they said it. They found that men and women in the study actually altered the pitch of their voice when on a good first date -- basically, taking on a more "masculine" or "feminine" voice when speaking to someone they were interested in